


Ships and Anchors

by StarlightQueen17



Category: The Legend of Zelda & Related Fandoms, linked universe au - Fandom
Genre: Adoption, Bittersweet, Brotherly Bonding, Character Study, Child Abandonment, Emotions, Family Issues, Found Family, Gen, Hyrule angst, Hyrule's backstory, LU Spring exchange 2020, Non traditional family structure, Parents As People, There is no easy answer, Twilight is a good bro, happy mothers day
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-26
Updated: 2020-04-26
Packaged: 2021-03-01 21:40:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,628
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23853952
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StarlightQueen17/pseuds/StarlightQueen17
Summary: That's the problem with learning more about someone, you might have something in common.The group arrives in Ordon, and all is not well with Hyrule. For someone who has always lived his life on the road and never stopped to consider his past, the sleepy country town brings up hard feelings. Feelings that grow harder to bury as he sees Twilight embraced by his adopted family and town. Working with Rusl, Hyrule finds a note that opens a long ignored wound, and must confront the ways he has been left behind, and how that follows him to this day. Hyrule learns that battles of the heart are the hardest fought, but it is one Twilight is prepared to help him with.
Relationships: Hyrule & Twilight (Linked Universe)
Comments: 8
Kudos: 122





	Ships and Anchors

**Author's Note:**

  * For [UnstoppableLinda](https://archiveofourown.org/users/UnstoppableLinda/gifts).



> This is my gift to the lovely, wonderful, and all around fun UnstoppableFish on the Linked Universe Discord server. I took the prompt "Hyrule and Twilight bonding in nature" and made it a little more angsty than intended. But it has lots of family love, and what better way to bond than through heart break. Happy spring my dear, I hope this is to your liking. 
> 
> This fic was inspired by the song "Never Love an Anchor" by The Crain Wives. They're a spooky folk band in the same vein as Hozier. The Crane Wives are amazing and if this touches you, listen to the song on Youtube to get some quality feels. Plus some of the lyrics are referenced in this fic so see if you can find the little easter eggs. Thank you in advance for checking this out!

Hyrule has seen hundreds of villages like Ordon, and he suspects he will see a hundred more throughout his life. When he was young, his watchers told him all villages had a warmth that poured out of them. The warmth started in the crackle of a lively hearth that stood in the center of a home, and filled it with light that spilled out the doors and windows like beacons. That’s what Terim, his first and most senior watcher said. When she died and Hyrule was passed along to another group of watchers, a young couple named Eva and Mia, they told him that the warmth of a village came from the heart of its people. 

“Villagers”, Eva said as he sat on her lap and gazed at the night’s sky, “Are always connected to each other. Many are born in the same bed they will one day die in. There is no running from each other, not for long. So they have to find love for each other. They connect to each other and that’s what builds the warmth they share.” As a child he didn’t truly understand that. What was so different about their warmth? Didn’t travelers and wanderers love each other? After all, Eva and Mia had held him close on cold nights, and they were all fond of each other. It should be the same. 

“Think of it this way,” Mia told him “Travelers are like the stars. We come and we go. Villagers are like a lighthouse. They stay in one place and they never move. Their light is always on.”

Hyrule hadn't understood until a year or two later. Eva and Mia moved on, and Hyrule found new watchers. A cycle that would repeat for much of his life. 

That was not something to dwell on now. Hyrule tightened his fingers around the lantern as he lifted it up and out towards the dirt path. The bite of metal against his skin was enough to keep him awake and on his feet, but even with the silvery lantern light shining on the path his tired eyes strained to see clearly. Thank the three that the light caught of the shine of Warriors armour in front of him. The last thing he needs is to be lost tonight. Although, that was not because the strange woods just outside the edge of town scared him and more due to wanting to fall into a nice bed as soon as possible. Getting lost means a disappointed lecture from one of the group leaders, an event that tends to be hard to sleep through. Not that he hadn't tried. 

In the heart of the night Ordon was hard to see clearly. He could only get glimpses from the lantern and the few lights of the other boys ahead of him. The untamed weeds they had stomped through twenty minutes ago were gone, replaced with well maintained flower beds, bushes, and trees. A few of the cylindrical houses had lights on but no one so much as peeked out a window. It wasn’t as if a group of nine heroes clad in various armors and carrying heavy weapons (Except for Wild who had a mop and a couple frying pans to protect himself with) was silent. Except for the soft “baaa” of goats and the reedy songs of crickets and cicada, they were the noisiest part of town. They definitely noticed. Perhaps they didn’t care. 

Still, there was nothing strange about Twilight’s home town. It felt slow and steady, as if time itself was too lazy or tired to carry on with its job. Exactly what Hyrule had seen before. The only odd thing was the shape of the houses, how they had circles at their base, not the squares he was used to. Some of them were raised up on hills, others kept to the ground. The house they headed to was sat in the hollow of a tree. A Giant Oak by the shape of it. Hyrule couldn’t tell if the tree grew around the house or if the house had been built in the tree’s mouth. The only light came from the window near the roof of the house, and created a slight silhouette of the home. It looked strangely big for just one person, but nine people might be over crowded. 

Twilight stood before it with pride. He held one lantern up in his right hand with his left on his hip. Shoulders back and head tipped to the sky, Hyrule could see the way his lips curled in a soft smile and his eyes glittered in the light. 

“I never thought I’d miss my home so much.” He whispered. He hadn't spoken to anyone in particular.

“It sneaks up on you, the home sickness.” Time said as he moved from somewhere behind Hyrule to twilight’s side. The old man rested a hand on his friend’s shoulder as he spoke. “It’s a weariness of the heart. I’m glad to know you came from such a nice place that you find yourself missing it.” Time said. Cryptic as always. To his right Hyrule could see Legend roll his eyes. He smothered a laugh in his hand as his friend made a silent gag at the pair. Legend always found the ‘secret language’ Time and Twilight had to be too saccharine for his taste. 

“Only way up is by the latter.” Twilight held up his light to the mossy ladder that hung from the side of the tree. “Everyone is welcome to whatever’s inside. Though I’m sure most of my bread is stale by now.”

“I’ll make more tomorrow.” Wild half mumbled as he shuffled forward and up the ladder. The dark bags under his eyes looked angrier than usual. Sky followed after him, and slowly they all began to line up. Hyrule found himself in the back with Legend. Time and Twilight stood to the side, barely Illuminated by the light in Twilight’s hand. They looked as if they stood against an endless void. 

“Will your house fit everyone?” Legend asked Twilight. All he could do was shrug. “Should be good enough for tonight. Though it should fit you eight at least.” Twilight's smile widened. Time turned to him with a curious glance. 

“You’re not joining us? It is your home after all.” Time asked. Twilight ran his free hand through his hair, his smile wavered just a tad. 

“Sorry. I just wanted to see Rusl and Uli tonight. It’s been so long, and I-” His voice cracked and his eyes searched for the words. In the light of the lantern he looked so pale, so young, and so normal. 

“They’re your friends?” Hyrule asked. It felt so odd seeing Twilight vulnerable. Twi was never a stoic man, even though he tried to be. Hyrule felt at this point, he knew Twilight well in many ways, but this was new to him. To all of them. Learning the details of their past. Twilight shook his head with a quiet chuckle. 

“They’re more like family. Rusl and Uli are basically my parents.” Twilight said slowly, as if it were a test. His eyes glanced at each of their faces but lingered on Time most of all. 

“My adoptive family, that is.” Twilight looked Time in the face fully at that. This was probably for the best. Time’s face was stoic but he smiled, it even reached his eye. Hyrule was glad Twilight needed Time’s approval so much. Because for some reason Hyrule could feel the smile fall off his lips and his chest grow tight. 

That’s the danger in learning more about someone. You might have something in common. 

“You should go see them.” Time said softly “I’m sure they would love a surprise visit.” He ruffled Twilight’s hair with a laugh. Twilight shook it off, his eyes turned back to the village and houses behind them. The slight smile he allowed himself turned into a cocky, boyish grin. 

“I’m sure they would. We promised to see each other again after all.” 

Hyrule didn’t hear much after that. His feet carried him to the ladder faster than even Legend’s. He may have cut in front of him but Legend probably wouldn’t hold it against him. He hurried up the tree and through the door, where he was met with a homey room. It wasn’t empty or filled with bare necessities. It was lived in. There were pelt rugs on the floor, some of which looked old and second hand but well taken care of. Four stood over a silver chest in the center, and Warriors poured over a small desk with paintings hung over it. The Captain opened a few jars and with each one the smell of dried herbs filled the room. Sky knelt by the door, fingers trailed over the spine of a few books stacked on a rickety shelf. 

Wind and Wild marched up from a set of stairs that must be out of his view. Both of them had wide grins and manic eyes. 

“You guys there’s a basement down here. Who wants to explore!” Wind nearly shouted. Wild turned to look at him excitedly, because who else enjoyed exploring as much as he did? Normally the prospect would wake Hyrule up and fill him with energy. 

“Not tonight” Hyrule said, not looking at the duo. “I’m really tired. I just want to sleep.” 

Wind and Wild were kind. They even promised to be very quiet so as not to wake him. Hyrule peeled off his boots, pulled out his sleeping roll and curled up next to the fireplace to the left of the room. Slumber took him quickly. 

Hyrule didn’t dream that night. He doesn’t dream most nights but it still felt like a sign when he woke up and it felt like hardly a minute passed. A sign of what, he wasn’t sure, but it certainly must be bad. He peeled his eyes open and was met with bright, soft light from the sun that filtered in through open windows and a wide open door. The room, and everyone in it, seemed so alive in the sunshine. Even the earth toned furniture that filled the house felt more homey rather than homely. Judging by the smell of cinnamon and fried bread that filled the room to the point you would think it were a bakery, Wild was indeed up and made good on his promise to make bread. In fact, everyone else was up, dressed, and scattered around the house. Four and Wind had climbed up to additional floors of the tree house, while Warriors and Time sat just outside the door as they ate whatever breakfast Wild had made. 

“It’s about time you woke up!” Sky said, and Hyrule turned around to the small kitchen where he, Wild, and Legend sat. Sky walked over with a plate of orange pumpkin bread rolls, a pat of butter, and a cup of tea all in one hand. His smile was as bright and cheerful as ever. “You slept in longer than me. It’s almost noon.” 

Damn. He hadn't slept in that late since he was ten, and that time it almost got him eaten by a Lynel. 

“Sorry. Guess the floor here is really comfy.” Hyrule said as he nibbled on the pastry. It was just as fluffy, buttery, and rich as any other time Wild had made it and yet he didn’t think he could eat more than one. 

“Don’t get used to it.” Legend said flatley, “Twi has a full day for us here in Ordon. We’re really out in the boonies so I expect we’ll have even more work than the ranch.” 

Hyrule nodded at Legend’s words as he pretended to let it all really sink in. Be respectful and all that. Then he stuffed the entire rest of the pumpkin bun in his mouth. 

“I call not handling any cuckoos.” He said through a mouth full of food. Legend grimaced. He was always surprisingly bound to proper rules and manners, despite being a vagabond like Hyruel himself. Probably more so now. Hyrule loved to poke at that part of Legend, if nothing else because his face was always so fun to watch. 

“Sky already laid claim to helping any bird farmers, but if you keep eating like that I’ll have Sky set them on you.” 

“Oh really?” Sky hummed. “Do I get a say in this?” 

“No, just do what I tell you.” Legend half comanded half laughed. Hyrule chuckled and stood up from his nest on the floor to wash up. By the time he had finished Twilight had returned to the house. His house. He wasn’t dressed in his tunic and wolf skin. Instead he wore a white shirt with a single green sleeve sewn onto his left arm, and a long green sirong that fell to his ankles. It wrapped around his waist and was bound with blue fabric. Gold colored embroidery trimmed the edge of the garment. From what Hyrule could see, they looked like triangles that alternated between pointing up or down. It was an odd sight. Twilight had always been in fitted clothing that looked more like Time’s things, at least as long as Hyruel had known him. That was how Hyrule thought of him. Tightly wound, precise, put together. That day he stood with clothes that flowed around him and seemed far lighter than what he normally wore. He led them out of the house and through the town, their large group caught the eyes of the village folk, but as soon as they saw Twilight with them they were all met with smiles and waves. 

Twilight led them to a small, unassuming house. It wasn’t any different from the other houses, certainly not as unique as Twilight’s, but Twilight picked up his pace the closer they got to it. Standing before the house was a man and a woman. The man looked older than Time. His dirty blond hair had streaks of grey, and his smile was surrounded by a thick, full beard. He had broad shoulders and his thick arms were tan and rough with hair. This man was rugged and masculine in a way that many of the men in town were. In a way that none of the Hylians are. You didn’t need to look at Twilight’s pointed ears to see he was a tad different from the Ordonians. The woman at his side was shorter, her pale blond hair cut short and close to her skull, and compared to either Twi or the man next to her, she was dressed plainly. Both of them smiled as soon as they saw Twilight. That seemed to be how the whole town reacted when they saw him. Welcoming, loving, warm. 

“Boy Link, you really weren’t kidding when you said you found heroes like you.” The man said as he glanced over the group. “Y’all look like you could be related!” Twilight chuckled. 

“It’s a little more complicated than that. Especially since our names are all Link, too. Don’t worry, we all have nicknames.” The man nodded his head slowly, but seemed more confused than before.

“Should we bother asking what trouble you’ve gotten yourself involved in?” The woman asked. 

“Not now. I think we have a little more work to do first. Promise to tell you later.” The woman gave him a cheeky grin and Twilight quickly turned back to the rest of the group. “Guys, this is Rusl and Ilia. They’re gonna be the ones pointing you around town. I know this place isn’t as exciting as the road but there’s plenty to do if you know where to look.” Rusl clapped Twilight on the back as he spoke and watched with pride as Twilight talked with everyone about where they’d be for the day. Rusl was indeed one of Twilight’s parents. It showed through in every look and smile and quick exchange. Twilight had a parent who knew him deeply. Hyrule took a deep breath as the tight, cold feeling wrapped itself around his chest again. _Don’t be ridiculous._ He breathed in. _Everyone has parents._ He breathed out. 

“Hyrule?” Twilight asked him. “What are you feeling like doing today bud?” Hyrule thought for a moment. 

“I’m not much of a farmer but I know my way around a sword. I’m fine wherever.” 

“I think I might have a place for him.” Rusl said. In an instant everyone had a place to work. Twilight had brought Warriors and Time goat herding with him, something he seemed far more excited about than any person should be. Wind and Four had gone off with a boy about their age, named Colin, to help the local village boys with sword play. Wild and Sky went off with Ilia although Hyrule wasn’t sure for what. Hyrule and Legend’s place, it turned out, was with Rusl to help him craft swords. Or rather, Legend helped with craft and Hyrule fetched things and made sure there wasn’t a mess. Overall, not a bad job to have. 

To step into the workshop felt like he had stepped into a warm embrace. The thick stone walls were cast in a deep gold and orange glow. The light from the flames of the forge oven flickered and danced on the walls and stretched all the way into the back. The wall furthest from the forge was filled with two steel cabinets, each full of rapiers, broadswords, and even a few curved blades. Hyrule hadn't expected such a small village to make such crafts, but then again any town that could produce a fighter like Twilight must have some pride in their sword craft. The workshop was one of the larger buildings he had seen in Ordon. It could easily fit ten people. Still, it carried the charm of a place far more intimate, with pictures of animals drawn by a child on the wall, and even though Legend scoffed at it, to Hyrule it was sweet. It was lived in. It was a home. Rusl had shown them around with a grin on his face and wanted to help them work. Hyrule had thought being around a man like Rusl would be awkward. He didn’t know any fathers, least of all his own, so he expected talking to Rusl to be difficult. Rusl, however, had an easy personality to be around. Legend sat near the forge as he slowly turned a lump of glowing red metal. Hyrule appreciated Legend’s quiet focus. That simple warmth.

“I’m surprised so many of you are blacksmiths.” Rusl said as he walked through the door with a bucket of water. “I never could get Link to take more than a passing interest in it. He loved being out with the animals too much.” Rusl set the bucket down next to Legend, who had an odd smirk on his face. 

“I’m sure. I remember quite a few times he wouldn’t shut up about goats no matter how much I tried to change the topic. There’s a reason his nickname is ranch hand after all.” Rusl chuckled and gently shook his head. 

“That sounds like my boy. He always tried to play the tough guy as a kid but he has a kind heart.” Rusl said with such softness and love in his voice that Hyrule’s heart nearly stopped. He knew the rest of him did. He could feel ice in his body as his muscles tensed and his hands stopped their work. Why did he feel that way? Rusl didn’t do or say anything wrong, he was just being a good man. A proud parent. What kind of person has their stomach churn because their friend had a nice dad? Hyrule thought. Just be happy and don’t be selfish. 

“Speaking of Twi- er Link as a kid,” Legend asked as he turned towards Rusl “You got any funny stories of him from when he was young?” Rusl met Legen’s grin with his own. A kind of mirth Hyrule couldn’t name passed between them. 

“Of course. Oh I remember when he was just five years old he always wanted to walk around with my old sword.”

When Hyrule was five he held a sword too. It was tiny, more like a long dagger, but his watchers gave it to him when they crossed monster infested lands. 

“He was the tiniest boy in town, but even then he was pretty strong. He carried that sword around on his shoulder all through town. He was determined to carry it.”

Hyrule carried his sword under a cloak. It was heavy in his arms. He knew it would have to be used some day, but as a child he reached for the hand of his watcher. He would rather hold their hand than a sword. 

“Even if he was strong enough to lift it, he couldn’t handle the size of it. He wound up turning sharply and fell hard. The sword flew into a bush but Link sumersalted down a hill. He refused to get up, I basically had to carry him.” Rusl laughed. Legend did too. 

Hyrule couldn’t remember his first injury, but he was certain he had been alone. He was certain he stood up immediately because that was all he knew. Suddenly that cold numb feeling turned hot. 

“Hyrule right?” Hyrule snapped to attention at Rusl’s voice. “If you go in the back room there’s a box with pictographs of Link as a kid. A pictobox is rare but we used to have someone from the capital stop by with one. Would you mind getting it?”

“Sure.” Link as a kid. If there were pictures of him as a child what would they look like? Not as vibrant as Wild’s photos. Not as funny as Wind’s. Would he even bother with them? Travelers can’t afford much sentiment. He watched as his watchers had left behind even precious things if they thought it wouldn't be good for survival. As Hyrule stepped into the back room he realized that was another difference between travelers and village folk. The back room consisted of a mattress with a messy ball of blankets piled on it, a tiny desk with a few wilted flowers in a dingy glass vase, and half carved horse figurines. The room was painted a dark blue, only distinguishable from black in the dull light of a small lantern that hung from the ceiling. Hyrule pushed the door closed behind him, fingers traced over a line of notches in the wood. Lines with numbers next to them. Some of them had the letter L next to them and others had C. He paused at those markings. So much effort to carve a notch into wood but there was no purpose to it. It was pointless, and yet it must mean something to be in such a personal space. Hyrule Just wasn’t sure _what_ they meant exactly. This room, it was full of pointless little scenes of life but it felt so much quieter than the main work room. Even in the tiny, cramped space he felt like there was more room to breath. There was no time to linger in it. Things to do, embarrassing pictures of friends to find. Getting lost in these weird _selfish_ feelings will do no good. 

He didn’t need to look long to find the box. It sat on the tiny desk, surrounded by other junk Rusl had left around it. It was about the size of Wild’s sheikah slate, but it was a good six inches tall. It was fairly old, with the black paint chipped around the edges and faded on the top. Inside was as much clutter as the rest of the room. Old receipts, postcards, and yes pictographs were jumbled together in a way that brought a smile to Hyrule’s lips. The pictographs were grainy and faded in color. One showed Twilight as a child, skinny and missing a tooth, and looking stubbornly proud as he held it up to the camera. A picture of him holding a baby. A picture of him at about fourteen dressed in wrestling shorts as he lifted a small goat over his head. In every single one of them he looked happy. Content. Hyrule smiled at the image of this carefree little boy with no worry or burden in his life. It was good that at least one of them got to have that. Hyrule gathered up the photos, one by one, when a small envelope caught his eye. Or rather, the name on the envelope. Written in now faded black ink was his own name.  
 _To Link_

It wasn’t for him. He knew that perfectly well when he plucked up the envelope from the box and opened it. But just the sight of his own name on a faded envelope sent something sharp and nasty through his heart. He pulled out an old and tattered letter, with fold creases that cut through the words and fingerprints stained in dirt on the edges. 

_My sweet son, there aren’t words fit to describe how I feel writing this. I hope that you read this surrounded by people who love you. Whether you read this as a child with your parents, or as a parent yourself, I hope I can provide answers. If you’ve ever wondered if I love you, the answer is yes. I loved you enough to give you up. I have always known my failings are greater than my strengths. I wanted to try to be a mother link, I really did, but I knew when I held you that couldn’t be what you needed. Any love I had would smother you. So I do not have remorse in my heart at saving you from myself. It’s a secret I have always known, that a ship can never truly love and anchor. -_

“Hyrule!” Legend snapped. Hyrule jumped and the letter and pictographs fell to the floor in a mess. Reality had come crashing back down on Hyrule. “Did you find those pictures?”

“Yeah, It was- It’s kinda messy here but I found them.” he lied. Half lied, he thought, Technically it’s true. He grabbed the photos and shuffled them into a pile. He had what he came for. He stood to leave, he should leave, this wasn’t any of his business. His eyes still found the letter on the floor. Without even thinking, he plucked it up and put it in his pocket. 

The fire in the hearth had dulled, and the golden tint the workshop once had faded with it. The forge was filled with only dying embers now. The stone walls retained their gray color as Legend pulled a blistered red piece of metal from the forge and set it on the anvil in the middle of the room. He was drenched in sweat, his eyes narrowed as he focused on his work. He spared Hyrule the lightest of glances. 

“Sorry for the mess back there.” Rusl said. His smile brought out the wrinkles in his face, his skin was a patchwork of lines carved from both joy and worry. “My wife says I have a way of holding on to junk and losing treasure, though she’s not much better. Luckily I haven’t lost these pictographs.” Hyrule handed them to Rusl as soon as the other man offered his hand. Legend had left his spot by the anvil at some point, Hyrule hadn’t been paying attention. He traced the outline of the note in his pocket and each time he thought of it and it’s content he felt unmoored. As if he had all the substance of a ghost. He turned back to the forge, away from the smiles and Rusl’s warm blue eyes. They didn’t notice him, they didn’t say a word. Hyrule stood by the forge and the glowing light of the hot metal of the anvil. 

He pulled the letter out of his pocket with numb fingers. Why were they numb? He didn’t really feel bad for reading this even though he should. Maybe in another life he would feel bad about it but in this life, right now, all he felt was emptiness. After all, his mother hadn’t left him a note or given any reason for leaving him. She left him near a camp of travelers. With strangers. He opened the letter and began to read again. 

_There will be days where I think of nothing but you. A selfish part of me hopes you think of me too. I know it is best if you don’t. I hope that you never know the reasons I have for keeping you away. Instead, think of the love that you will know in your life. You deserve to be held in arms that are careful. Think of the ones who soothed your hurts, and those who taught you to stand tall. It is best I never have the chance to take that from you. It is better if we love each other with no knowledge of who we are. Link, I-_

“Link.” That was his name. That was his name directed at him, in speech. How long had it been since he used his name and not a title? How long since someone had said it with such urgency? Legend had moved closer to him. His mouth was drawn in a tight frown. He held his arms up as if he were asking permission to touch him. “What’s wrong?” 

Hyrule tried to speak, wanted to tell him nothing was wrong, but all he could manage was a frayed gurggle. His throat and chest were tight, as if they had collapsed on themselves. His face felt hot, like the forge had spit its embers on his cheeks and behind his eyes. 

“Nothing.” He choked. It was a pathetic lie and he wouldn’t blame Legend for being insulted that he even tried it. 

“Nothing is wrong? Is that why you look like you’re about to cry?” Legend said. Hyrule ducked his head and looked to the ground. He couldn’t stand to see the concern on Legend’s face, the pity in his eyes. 

“I don’t. Leave it be Legend, it doesn’t concern you. I don’t need your opinion as much as you think I do.” He said in a rough voice, words sharp and meant to sting. There was nothing so satisfying as words used as knives, especially when you’re hurting. It’s an ugly trait, one his watchers discouraged half heartedly and one he hid deep down. Down with his shadow. But then again, every watcher who ever told him to mind his words came and went. 

“What do you have there?’ Rusl asked. His voice was gentle and curious rather than probing or angry. 

“I- its... “ He choked, his eyes still couldn’t meet Rusl’s, “I was just curious. I’ll put it back.” 

“You’re not in any trouble,” Rusl continued, “I just want to know what’s wrong so we can help.” 

“I don’t want your help.” Hyrule snapped. Rusl looked taken aback, his eyes wide. Hyrule could see the hurt in them. Had Twilight ever said anything like that to him? To anyone? 

“What do you want Hyrule?” Legend asked softly. Hyrule shook his head. The room was dizzying or perhaps he was dizzy. He couldn’t bring himself to speak. Couldn’t bring himself to look at Legend. He staggered back, footsteps uneven as he drifted towards the door. 

“I don’t know.” He whispered. It sounded pathetic to his own ears, his voice cracked and broke like he was a child. “I just… I don’t want to be here.” 

Everything was hot, and wet, and fragile. Legend and Rusl didn’t come closer to him. They let him grab the door handle and walk out of the forge and its sweltering heat. 

All that mattered was moving forward, even if it meant leaving something behind. Hyrule didn’t know where he wanted to be, he only knew where he wanted to avoid. He had no destination in mind, just the feeling of one foot in front of the other. In some ways it was soothing. It was like growing up. It brought back memories of long days and nights where he would slip out of his watchers sight and wander ahead as they searched for a place to rest. There was no guide except for the wind and no boundary except for the mountains. 

Walking through the village of Ordon was somehow harder than walking through a wasteland. In the hours of dusk the sky turned bloody, a rich red ripped through the golden clouds as the sun fell further away. It made the trees and hiltops in the distance look black, as if they had been burned. The people of this village were kinder than what he would find in his world. He walked by children playing in the street dressed in clothing similar to Twilight’s and with wide smiles on their chubby cheeks. Their eyes glittered with a mischievous light and were utterly devoid of worry. He wandered by elderly people, with stringy gray hair bound in fragile buns, and skin as rough and worn as the earth itself. He saw a woman with short blond hair hold a baby girl in pink on her hip and a basket of fruit in the other as if it were easy. Natural. Every single person he passed added a weight to his heart. Every step in the village border felt weighed down. 

When the sun set below the clouds Hyrule found himself in a spring. It sat nested in a sunken area that looked as if it had been pushed down by a great weight. The water was the clearest he had ever seen. Fed by a three tiered waterfall, the spring almost radiated a silver glow where the ripples were smallest and the water poured into it. The trees and ivy vines that grew around the spring were larger than the other plants in Ordon. Their leaves were a richer shade of green. It was a good place to rest. 

Hyrule took off his shoes and placed them far from the shore line. Slowly, he stepped into the spring’s edge and sucked in a harsh breath as the icy water lapped at his toes. Water that clear and that cold must have come from deep underground. Today was probably the first time it saw the sun in centuries. Hyrule sat on the sand and stretched his legs out into the spring, content to just be with the wind, the water, and the stars. It reminded him of when he was a boy and he would sit with his watchers. Sometimes they had a fire, but on summer nights when it was still warm even without the sun the stars would be their only source of light. Terim would tell him the stories of the constellations, no matter how much her voice would wheeze and break. Eva and Mia would show him how to follow the sky instead of a map. Ren, the half blind ex knight who always stood straight back like a scarecrow, taught him how to hold a sword and fight even in the darkness. What would they say if they saw him like this? So emotional, so vulnerable, so weak? Weakness was not something one could afford in his world. It was something you allowed yourself in the most private moments of your life. Terim had only cried in the seconds before her death. He fell apart at a letter. Perhaps they were all right to leave him. 

The sharp snap of a twig caught Hyrule’s attention. The soft pad of sandals on earth grew closer and closer. Hyrule stood to his feet and reached for his sword at his side, but stopped as a familiar face. Twilight stood at the entrance to the spring. Moonlight illuminated his face and gave him a pallid color. He stood tall, and Hyrule could see the difference in them more clearly than in any light of day. Twilight was muscular where Hyrule was wiry. Hyrule had sharp edges where twilight had softness. Twilight was steady where Hyrule was flighty. Hyrule wondered what the moon must feel when it looked at the sun and knew it had just a pale imitation of its light. Twilight stepped closer and Hyrule readied himself to apologize. To smile, to make things right, to move on. He waited for Twilight to speak with a grim eagerness. 

“I thought you might be here.” Twilight said gently, “This spring is supposed to be healing. Ilia took Epona here when she got hurt. They say there’s spirits made of pure light that dwell within it.”

“Does it work?” Hyrule asked. 

“Depends on the type of hurt.” Twilight replied as he sat on the shore. He had a gentle smile that made the weight in Hyrule’s heart heavier. 

“Legend told you what happend?” He knew the answer. Twilight just gave him a nodd. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have taken the letter.” Hyrule fumbled with his pockets, his hands searching for the small paper as he hurriedly walked towards Twilight. He grasped the paper tight and extended it to its owner. “Here. I’m sorry.” He croaked. 

Twilight didn’t even glance at the paper. He kept his gaze on Hyrule. 

“You don’t need to be sorry. I didn’t come for that back either. I realize we don’t know each other that well, but I-I wanted to talk to you.” 

“I’m okay.” Hyrule said. His voice was slightly louder than a whisper. “I just forgot myself. I promise it won’t happen again.”

“It’s okay if it does.”

“No it’s not.” Hyrule snapped. “I yelled at Legend and Rusl. They didn’t deserve that and I’m sorry. Please, can we just move on from this?”

“It’s not something you can just move on from.” Twilight stood. He tried to look Hyrule in the eye but Hyrule had to look up to face him. “It’s not a feeling that goes away easily. I know what it’s like. I-”

“Stop.” Hyrule said. At some point he had balled the letter in his fists while Twilight spoke. “It’s not the same. You don’t know what I feel right now, because I don’t even know what’s wrong with me.” Hyrule’s throat burned with every word. He didn’t speak very loudly, or forcefully, but Twilight was silent all the same. “Why do I feel like this village is suffocating me? Why does seeing my friend happy make me feel like screaming? I don't do this Twilight. I don’t fall apart just because other people are happy. So why is this happening?” 

“Why aren’t you happy Hyrule? Don’t you think if you really feel that miserable there’s a reason? Don’t you want to fix that?”

“You don’t get to talk to me about that. You haven’t been through half of what the rest of us have.” 

No one spoke. No one moved. For a few painful minutes the sound of the waterfalls were all Hyrule could hear. 

“You’re right.” Twilight said. His voice was rougher than Hyrule had ever heard it. “I don’t know exactly how you feel, but I know being alone will only make things worse.”

“I guess I’m just used to being alone.” Hyrule said. A dark chuckle ended his sentence. “Even when I’m with you heroes I am alone. Everything we are is temporary. We will part ways. But you’ll come here and have parents welcome you back. I will never have that.” Twilight’s hand rested on his shoulder. His hands were rough and blistered and Hyrule leaned into it. He didn’t say anything, and Hyrule didn’t want him to. “My mother didn’t write me a note. She left me in a tree in the middle of the woods. There was no blood, no sign of injury or struggle. She just didn’t want me. I used to think it was just how things are. People leave you and you have to accept that. Everyone who raised me left me and I was fine with that, I accepted that is how it works. I knew that’s not how everyone lived, but seeing you with parents who found you and kept you? A father who kept all these pointless little things about your life for no other reason than he likes thinking of you? Why does it work that way for you and not me? Why didn’t she bother to give me a name? Did she just look at me and know I would be selfish, and broken and just…” Hyrule’s voice left him. All he could do was choke back a sob and try to keep his vision clear. It was a losing battle. Tears spilled down his cheeks and on to the sand. Hyrule was tired of trying to hold them back. The world can be as harsh as it’s always been, the others can mock him and see him for the false hero he’s always been but in this moment all he can be is this. 

“There’s no shame in it.” Twilight murmured. His voice sounded almost as rough and rugged as Hyrule’s. “In this. In getting all of it out. But Hyrule you are not selfish or broken. You’re kinder and braver and smarter than you think you are.” Twilight wrapped Hyrule in his arms and pulled him close to his chest. Hyrule didn’t fight it. When was the last time someone just held him like this? Twilight didn’t try to stop his tears. He didn’t try to make him smile or tell him to keep. He let Hyrule sink into his shoulder and let him fall apart. 

The moon had risen fully in the sky by the time Hyrule looked up. A half moon with a bright ring of light around it. Moonlight spilled down into the spring and the water began to glow a gentle golden color. The bugs hidden in the shadows of the trees sang in reedy hums. The air was cold and each breath was a chill down his throat and into his chest, but Twilight’s warmth was inescapable. At some point he had even wrapped Hyrule in his wolf pelt. Hyrule took a deep breath of the night air and pulled away from Twilight. His neck was stiff and his eyes burned but his head was clear. He couldn’t remember the last time he cried so hard he left a stain on clothing. Perhaps when he parted ways with Ren to go on his own journey through the caves of Hyrule. Maybe even as long ago on Terim’s dying day? It was raw emotion he hadn't quite found a place for. 

“Feeling better?” Twilight asked. Hyrule thought about it for a moment. 

“I don’t know. I think this is the first time I’ve ever thought about this. I think you’re right though, this won’t go away easily. Does it ever go away?” 

Twilight slowly turned his gaze to the spring and said nothing. 

  
  
  


“People will come and go. Feelings will come and go. Sometimes I think it’s not worth it. Mostly I believe it is though.” 

Hyrule nodded. Like any form of hurt, abandonment leaves a scar. Like any scar it can be reopened. 

“Can I have that note?” Twilight asked. Hyrule had almost forgotten about it. He handed it to Twilight who looked at it with furrowed brows. “I read this so many times as a kid. I used to think she didn’t want to be my mom because I would drag her down. Now I think it’s the opposite. She wanted to give me opportunities I wouldn’t have with her.” Twilight smiled faintly down at the note. With clever fingers he began to fold and work the paper into a cupped shape. “I found my peace with her. She tried to make the best of a bad situation. She saw herself as an anchor, but I hope she found her peace too. ” Twilight looked to Hyrule. He had turned the note into a paper boat. 

“I think she loved you.” Hyrule said weakly, “I think… I hope that if I can see the people who raised me again, they still love me.”

“I’m sure they do.” Twilight said as he stepped towards the shore. He knelt down on his knees and pushed the little boat out onto the water with a gentle nudge. The fragile thing bobbed over the waves and made its way towards the waterfall and away from the both of them. Hyrule rested a hand on Twilight’s shoulder as the two of them watched the boat sail into the waters of the spring. He stood hurt and sore and hollowed out, but still he stood tall. He relished in the trickle of water, the chirps of the night time woods, and the warmth that radiated off his friend. Twilight looked tired, his blue eyes red and watery, his breath was strained and forced to keep a stable rhythm, but still he was at peace. Travelers always drift apart. They come and they go and they sever all ties as needed. That’s how Hyrule was raised. But maybe even if a parting must come, he thought, those you know will leave a mark on you forever. In little, unseen ways, they’re always there. He didn’t know if that was always for the best. Perhaps Hyruel’s mother would leave a mark that never fades, or perhaps it will oneday be forgotten. Peace was far away, a light that came and went and in some ways never existed. He watched as the little boat collided with the waterfall and sunk beneath the waves to the bottom of the spring, all he had was clarity.


End file.
